Thursday, March 27, 2014

Golden Memories

I've kind of been putting off writing this post because I've known what I wanted to write about, but I haven't been able to make myself get the words out of my mind. You guys may know this, since I think I've written about it before, but every year at my school I perform in the winter musical.

This year the musical was Legally Blonde and because of snow days, we ended up being about seven rehearsals behind schedule. The last week and a half of rehearsal (a.k.a. "Hell Week," and aptly named) was one of the most frantic and longest weeks I'd ever had. And I loved every minute of it. I helped a bit with the stage crew because the set transitions were insane. Running around backstage, getting everyone's hair and makeup in place, figuring out where to put our costumes for quick changes; every moment of it was funny and interesting, and made the whole company really focus and work to get the show perfect.

And at the end of everything, when the cast party's done, the senior speeches had been said, and all of the goodbye tears had dried, I took a step back to savor the feeling that for at least a few hours, in my small corner, everything was right in the universe.

Looking around that room, I realized that I was going to have to treasure this glowing feeling forever because it was never going to happen again. That particular group of people, who had worked together and grown together, was never going to be all in the same room together ever again. From that day forward, there would always be someone missing, or who graduated, someone who didn't share the experience of this specific show. And I felt the loss of this family because I knew it was going to evolve and change into something unknown, but at the same time I felt so proud of all of us. The happiness that was so evident in everyone's eyes reflected silvery all through the room and filled up my lungs so I could barely breathe through the joy of it. I wanted to take a step and start floating through the air because I knew with absolute certainty that this love all around me would not let me fall.

And I know that I'll never feel that way again, not exactly. So I'm going to cherish it, and remember it, and let it carry me through dark times, because I know that the world is so full of gorgeous shining moments waiting for me to find, and when that time comes I'll remember that too.

That was a lot more metaphorical than I was originally intending, but I quite like how it turned out. Thanks for listening to me going on about feelings again, guys. I'll see you all soon.

Leslie Ann O'Dell; Unknown; last two courtesy of BKBROWN

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

The Day of Days

Today was my birthday!! I'm seventeen now. And I know that people say that they don't really feel different when they get older, and I don't, not really. But I can't deny that my birthday has always felt particularly special to me. Every year I wake up and my whole body feels like it's buzzing and floating all day. Usually this is accompanied by lots of smiling and skipping around.

But I can genuinely say that I had a fantastic day. I woke up and had a delicious yet smelly breakfast before getting to go to school and spend the day with my friends. I had to stay after school until late but my mom brought me a fast food dinner from Popeyes, which I get every year for my birthday, and that was awesome too. And then, when I finally got home, my family surprised me with cupcakes and ice cream, and inviting one of my best friends over to celebrate. Then, I got to Skype with friends and important people who live far away.

All in all, I loved every second of it, and I love my friends and I love everything basically.

I hope everyone reading this has as good a day as I just has sometime soon. I love you all too. Goodnight :)

Wednesday, February 26, 2014

It's Almost Here

God, you guys, I feel awful about totally ignoring this place for so long, but the stress and ridiculous amount of weekend activity in my life has sky rocketed yet again, thank you American school system. Lately all of my thoughts have consisted of college, college majors, panicking about college majors, and ways to keep my parents out of my room so they don't notice how messy it's gotten. Lovely for me, though, I don't have to bother with that last one any more because just yesterday they played on of their favorite games again, something I like to call Literally Kicking Everything On The Floor In Morgan's Room Into The Hallway.

Other things have happened in the last month, I'm sure of it. I can't really think of anything at the moment but I might as well start off with the classic Valentine's Day commentary. My personal interest in Valentine's Day is that the chocolate is crazy cheap the day after, so that's totally awesome. My best friend and I exchanged teddy bears and the one she got for me is totally adorable. It's pretty big and its holding a red heart with roses sewn onto it.

I also finally saw Frozen, the new Disney princess movie!! This guy at school as been singing its compliments for the greater part of a month now, and I have to agree that it was really very good. Elsa and Anna were perfect and I want to put Olaf in my pocket so I can keep him. It did remind me a lot of Tangled, but I maintain that Tangled was better and had a better story. Sorry, but I can;t help myself when it comes to Flynn. :P

Anyway, thought I might as well give you a little update as to how I'm doing, as well as to mention the fact that MY BIRTHDAY IS NEXT WEEK!!. I, this funny-looking little blogger, am turning seventeen next week! It's crazy, I know. I'm still having awkward realizations every so often that I'm already a junior and that the school year is almost thee quarters passed.

Also, I may have accidentally settled on a major to seriously look into as a career, so I'll keep you all up to date on any changed is my commitment phobia department.

See you soon !

Wednesday, February 5, 2014

Welcome to Hell Frozen Over

Hey guys! It's been a while since I've sat down to type something out, even though it seems like I've had more free time than ever considering that today was the fifth snow day my school has had within a month and a half. I appear to be approaching the limit to how many Best Ink marathons a person can enjoy in a small period of time.

I do enjoy the snow, though. Maybe not rolling around in it, thanks to a past trauma involving a pair of skinny jeans, but I do think that a world covered in snow is one of the prettiest things to witness. It makes everything seem shiny and bright, like a good rain makes everything smell new and green.

I like wasting time doing that when I'm bored sometimes. I'll try and think of what everything smells like and reminds me of. Since snow-covered air is the cleanest, most wonderful thing, I'd say it smells like the color white or blue. The beach smells like neon teal, and campfires smell like a creeping, almost seductive kind of grey-maroon.

Okay, I just read that back to myself and it sounds pretty dumb now. Oh well.

I wish I could at least go Ice skating, but my parents are busy actually working during the work week and I don't have any other ways of getting a ride. I adore ice skating, I think it feels like flying. It's one of the very best things about winter. If I could skate really well I would want to join a hockey team, I think. On reflection, I may have an alarming tendency for rather dangerous sports. This theory is supported by my kind of obsessive interest in lacrosse, hockey, and roller derby. If I ever thought for a minute I could be on a football team and get to be something other than the kicker, I'd do that in a heartbeat.

I think that's enough rambling for me today. Goodnight, folks.

Saturday, January 25, 2014

My Room is a Warzone

Hey you guys. It's finally the weekend and I could cry I'm so relieved. I officially have no obligations to anyone for the next two days.

So tonight, I feel like talking about my room. It's not actually a war zone, like the title states, unless you count the fact that it's usually so messy that you can't see the floor. No. My room is perfect. I have stuff on all of my walls, and it's so beautiful and colorful. I hate the cold and the temperature in here is always a few degrees warmer than the rest of the house too. At this exact moment, I'm snuggled under the covers on my bed, convinced beyond a shadow of a doubt that this is the most comfortable place on earth. If I could survive here, I wouldn't ever move.

In all honestly, this room is my happy place. It's were I go to be entirely at peace. I can hide around up here and relish the joy of being absolutely alone. This feeling is like being surrounded by a field of silence where there's no movement and I can let my bones melt into the ground. Sometimes I just need to let myself disappear for a little bit, and this space gives me something to come home to when the rest of the world doesn't do anything but burn into little pieces.

Anyway, I'm almost falling asleep over the keyboard so I'm going to sign off. Thanks for reading guys.